One tree Hill...

I meant to write this post on 28th but ive just checked the time and noticed its 12.00am:date- 29th...wow how time flies by. Anyway yesterday i was a bit selfish with my thoughts, i was watching one tree hill the fourth season and i was just filled with mixed feelings...the song by Gavin Degraw touched me in ways I could not explain!

As I watched the series...a lot of memories flooded back, things that I thought I had forgotten but are back. A person I am struggling to forget came back to me through watching one tree hill. This may sound weird but i saw alot of me and them in there...the only difference is we were doing it wrong while Lucas and Brooke were doing it right. Cliche aint it for me to compare...but if you took a walk in my shoes from 5am January 22nd 2007 to now you would understand.

I am in a room...and my thought is that its only one person who has the key to set me free. I dont know, i may be right i may be wrong. Though what i know is its hard to carry painful memories and sad thoughts, we as human beings need a chance to make a mistake to know what is right for them or not. I need to relinquish and cleanse...ive made alot of progress and I DONT WANT TO BE ANYTHING OTHER THAN WHAT I AM TRYING TO BE LATELY!

At this time of flooding memories session...i ask my self, who do I want to be and will I be able to live with the person I choose to be?

On a positive note I got some amazing news today...I introduce Dorothy M to my blog today. Well in realistic circumstances (for those who know) were not allowed by society to be friends...I mean the kind of circumstances we became friends always amazes me. I am glad I did...ill share her. Shes an amazing person, Kind hearted and the most considerate being ive met, very hardworking an a go getter...someone once told me im the lazy version of Dorothy! haa haa very funny. Anyway she got a job today in the most miraculous way ever...from her I realised The God I serve is a mighty one...and I wish her the best of luck!

Well im about to sleep right now...but one thing that I know I do not regret offering peace and a white dove to you...I do not regret not wanting to hope...but I do regret that the peace dove was not accepted, because as humans...we make rash decisions not knowing that our futiure is a second ahead of the moment and that second may change your life forever. I'll strive to make peace and not war because I fight for something that I believe in and it doesnt matter if its right or wrong...and i don't regret being me...